Relationships As Sacred Mirrors

(Old Post— 2022)

The joy and pain of relationships is the mirror that we hold to ourselves.

Relationships are complicated because they remind us of our own flaws. It takes guts to see our shortcomings and love them anyway. That is what happens when we see another person at their best and worst, it is simply a reminder of ourselves. 

Compatibility is only true up to a certain point. The only truth is that who we are looking at is an extension of ourselves and what we are seeing is a reflection of things that live within us. As an energetic match you cannot see something in a person that you do not already have within yourself in a repressive or reactive state. Even in the enlightenment, in the highest expression of who we are, we can miss the other person’s holiness by not having that gift within ourselves. It goes to the good and the bad.

Relationships are complicated because they make us go into an inner journey that sometimes we are not ready for.

The most hardships you will find happen between two people who swear they love each other. The reality is that majority of people do not know the love they speak on, thereby cloaking obsession and possessiveness with a pretense of romance. A lack of freedom from being your most authentic self is the definition of fear. Quite the opposite of love, fear lives in the shadows, where we do not speak of it or see it move. 

Always choose the most authentic and highest expression of who you are and pick the things that are aligned with that truth. It is imperative that you recognize when something is amiss as it shines brightly and you still can’t see it clearly. I have arrived at many conclusions of love, the most important being that love is a radical acceptance of who you have in front of you. One of my best friends once told me, “you cannot pick and choose the things you love about a person.” You either love their wholeness or you don’t. 

When you pick not loving who they are, you pick not loving yourself.

The secret lies in that acceptance. In understanding their wholeness makes them unique and that their flaws are simply blocked gifts that haven’t found a way to the light yet. The frustration and negativity you feel is where you will find your unlimited potential, but you have to be able to discern what is yours to work with. You have to find the courage to go through this journey where you might not like what you see but by nurturing it you can transmute it into something much more beautiful.

Our shadows are ours to play with. As much as you would like to not have it roaming around, it is what makes you interesting. Your shadow holds your light dormant. All you have to do is turn on the light and the monsters won’t look as creepy anymore, if anything they will look like they need love and proper guidance. This is the truth. Befriend your monster so you can befriend others’. Other people do not know how to love themselves properly yet, so it is a tall order to expect them to treat us in a loving way. We can show them what love means by handling ourselves with kind and gentle hands.

Proper love is when you hold all the bits and pieces of who you are and you share them proudly. Like a kid showing their best attempt at a painting. They are proud, even if they are not Picasso. This sharing is what makes a relationship beautiful. Two deeply flawed beings holding space for one another’s authentic being. It is not restricting, it is not obsessive, it doesn’t label right or wrong, it simply asks that you see it and share with it what you love about it. This is how you can nurture and grow love, by contemplating it. 

Relationships are complex yet there is a simple art of loving that we must recognize as key to successful partnerships. Once you have this key in your belt, the great loving world of relationships is yours. You can love yourself as deeply as you love another person and vice versa. It takes great light to see the extension of source that is each individual person. People are beautiful, let’s spread that loving awareness to who they are, so they can see themselves properly.